Passion For God

I said to the man

Who stood at the gate of the year,

“Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.”

And he replied, “Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the hand of God

That shall be to you

Better than the light And safer than a known!”
So I went forth

And finding the hand of God

Trod gladly into the light.

Today i went to the global leadership summit, and my heart was stirred so much for god. I felt an umbelievable sense of "holy discontent"

I really don't know where i'm going, what i will be doing in the future. I reality, after i finish this degree i don't know where i will be going, i don't know who i will be seeing, but i know that i want to be following Jesus.

The only thing in this life that keeps me from falling apart is him, and the thing that amazes me, is that i dissapoint god, i think, on a weekly basis, yet he always takes me back.

I'm pushing forward, i'm trying to convay this love to other christians, to non-believers. It is amazing, at my work, simply words, just being nice, just being me, i can really sense that i'm reaching out to these people. I'm trying to find the right moment, when god will allow me to be his vessel for him to speak through.

You know, i have friends that really respect the courage that they think i have to reach out to ppl, but it's not true courage, it's not me... i don't want to be rejected, i don't want to put myself out on the line. I want to be accepted, i want to fit in. BUT, but i have a passion, a desire, a burning in my heart, the knowledge that "outside of the Jesus Christ and the resurrection, there is no other hope for man kind"

I want to go out in the blaze of glory for God. You know i don't know how long, or how short this life is going to be, but i want to make damn sure i get my bang for money. How do i do this, how do you do this? Today, i learnt it. You find your passion, you find the thing that makes you so discontent, that your body burns with the desire to do something about it.

Then....

Then....

Then.... you feed it.... You don't run away, you get whatever this is, and use it to catapult yourself into ministry.

For me, it is poverty, extreme poverty... for me, it's see people being abused and taken advantage of, forced to do things they don't want to do... This make a firestorm in me, and if vengence wasn't the lords, alone. I would kick who evers ass that was from here, to where ever the hell they came from.

On a different note. I love who i am in christ, and i know everyone thinks i use my blog just to preach, but this is what makes me tick, this is what builds me, this is what fuels me to go as far as i can.

God bless, hope this has been encouraging.

Ben.